R.I.P Little Lady xxx

It has been a heartbreaking week up at the farm this week as we very sadly lost Betty. On Tuesday I had gone up to the farm as normal after work to check on the horses and give them their tea. I arrived at the farm at about 5pm, it was dark, cold and windy. I opened the gate and walked round to the feed room to find Star, Fella and Barbara waiting for their tea. I instantly knew something was wrong as there was no sign of Betty. Normally Betty was the first at the feed room and she always stayed close to the herd so I knew it was a bad sign she wasn't with the other three. I searched the field in the dark shouting  her name until I finally found her lying down. I went straight over to her and tried to get her up. She couldn't, her back leg was clearly injured as she couldn't put any weight on it. I quickly rang my vet Nick who straight away asked the obvious question if I thought it was colic. My response was no as she wasn't showing any signs of colic, I knew it was her leg. He said he would contact the on call vet, Nick's practice partner Dave who would give me a call ASAP once he was on his way. As it was cold and windy I went to get one of Fella's rugs and wrapped it round her. I then sat with her stroking her face and talking to her. I think she was in shock to be honest as she was quite calm. I rang my partner Neil who said he would come straight up. I then contacted Helen who unfortunately was away with her partner. As Helen is Betty's other mum I felt it imperative to keep her abreast of what was going on. My friend Kate happened to call so I told her what was going on so she offered to come straight up too. Dave the vet rang pretty soon after and asked for directions, he advised me he would be with us in about 25 minutes. It wasn't long before Neil and Kate arrived. Kate stayed with myself comforting Betty and Neil went to keep watch for Dave. I was very glad to have both of them with me and will be forever grateful to both of them.

Once Dave arrived he did an initial assessment of Betty, he took her temperature and checked her heart beat but they were both close to normal. Like Nick he also initially thought it might have been colic but he quickly ruled it out, so he asked us to try and get Betty up. I said we could try but I didn't think we could as I thought her right hind leg was injured. Straight away as soon as we tried, he agreed it was her back leg causing the problem. Upon closer inspection he informed us unfortunately Betty's leg was broken and there was nothing he could do. He said it was the type of break you would see on a race horse who has fallen whilst galloping on the track. It was a clean break at the joint. With a break of this type I was fully aware there was nothing Dave could have done other than put her to sleep. Whilst he went to his car to get his kit we all kissed, hugged and talked to Betty. I also rang Helen to give her the sad news, she was understandably incredibly upset but agreed it was the only option and the kindest thing to do for Betty. I felt awful delivering that news to her when she was supposed to be on a romantic break away with her husband. Dave was lovely with Betty and us. He showed great compassion and empathy. I held Betty as she went to sleep, kissed her and said goodnight to her. She went very peacefully. Dave told us he felt it had just been a freak accident. There were no signs of kick marks or anything of that nature so he thinks she must have been galloping around and she has just fallen awkwardly, unfortunately breaking her leg in the process. He did not think she had been there very long as the swelling wasn't very noticeable yet which indicated it had only recently happened. This made me feel better as at least she hadn't been there for very long. Whilst all this was going on Barbara was very distressed, I think she could sense something was wrong with her sister. Dave advised us to leave Betty's body where it was for the night so the rest of the herd could say goodbye and come to terms with her passing. The next day Neil witnessed Fella biting at Betty's leg to try to get her to stand up. On the Wednesday when we arrived to move the body Fella was licking her face and Barbara was pawing at her try to get her to stand up. This is a natural reaction of horses when one of their herd falls, but it was heartbreaking to watch. Since Betty's passing the rest of the herd have been very somber and subdued so I think they know she has passed. 

After a conversation with Helen we decided we would bury Betty in our field, then she would always be with us and the rest of the herd. In England horses and ponies can be buried if they were pets. The next day Neil took a half day from work and started to dig her grave and I asked some of my friends Michael, Adam and Cory to come and help us move her body down to our field and next to where Neil was digging her grave. Myself and Helen will be forever grateful to those lads for helping us move her with dignity. On Thursday Neil finished digging her grave-for which we will be eternally grateful to him for, so we decided we would bury her today, which was Saturday morning. Myself, Helen, Neil and Helen's husband Kev arrived at the field this morning to lay our little lady to rest. We carefully lowered her into her grave along with a carrot and some horse treats as she loved her food. Helen and I then both said a few words as we threw the first handfuls of earth over her. Neil and Kev then did the rest until she was fully covered and her grave was complete. They made a lovely job of her grave and we are both very thankful to them both. Helen and I made a cross out of some wood and buried a tree in remembrance of her and to mark the spot of her grave. We then said our goodbyes and laid some white roses for her. It is nice to know Betty will always be with us and the rest of the herd in our field and that we have a place we can visit and remember her. 

Helen rang the RSPCA shelter to let them know what had happened. They were lovely and said they were happy we had been able to give her such a lovely life while she was with us. I am very grateful for Helen contacting the shelter as I think I would have found this too upsetting. Betty was an absolute legend and in the short time we had her, which was a year and four months she brought such joy to our lives. She was the type of pony that didn't let anything phase her. She was more than happy to help herself to Fella's tea on a regular basis, which I don't think he was ever very pleased about! She was always first at the feed room at tea time, she loved her food! She was a master escape artist, she could get through any type of fencing. She would happily stand of her own accord, untied and get a groom, she loved to be fussed over. She took the starring role in my work Nativity and she got 1st and 2nd in her first ever show with us. She loved to go out for hand walks, any type of traffic would pass us and she would barely raise her head. She would have made a fantastic children's pony as she was bombproof. Below are some pictures of Betty showing happy memories during her time with us. 

 
 

On Thursday we received a lovely card from my vet Nick offering his condolences. I thought this was a really nice touch and just exemplifies why I have been with his practice for over ten years. We also received a lovely card each from our friend Vic. As well as the cards, Helen and I also received a lovely bouquet of flowers each from our friends Alex, Cory, Leanne, Michael, Adam and Lauren. What a lovely group of friends we have to make such a thoughtful gesture.

Below is the last picture taken of Betty a couple of days before we lost her.

Rest in Peace Little Lady.

RSPCA Felledge Betty Boop 2012-2019

My Shining Star

I have owned Star for over ten years now and there hasn't been a day that has gone by that I haven't felt incredibly lucky to have her. A lot has happened in my life over those ten years including losing several of my family members and going through a really difficult breakup, but Star has been by my side every step of the way getting me through. It's ten years this year since I lost my big brother Hugh, pictured below:
                                     
I was absolutely devastated when Hugh died as it came as a complete shock. I can still remember getting the phone call from my older sister Kathy to tell me he had died. I slid down the wall into a heap on the floor, dropped the phone and stayed there crying for what felt like hours. Hugh was a soldier in the British Army. He served in Kosovo, Bosnia and Iraq, but he suffered terribly from PTSD that was never treated. From the outside you would never know he was struggling as he was always the life and soul of the party. Sadly Hugh felt he could no longer live in this world and on the 19th August 2009 he took his own life. I think a piece of me died the day he did as I honestly have never gotten over it and I never will. The days, weeks and months that followed his death are a bit of blur to be honest, but what I do remember is the one thing that would get me out of bed was Star. Helen and I were on a livery yard at the time with our other friend Kate on part livery-this meant full livery Monday-Friday then DIY Saturday and Sunday. It was a brilliant yard to be on at the time, it was run by a lovely family, had a great bunch of liveries and the facilities were excellent-it even had an arena with a full set of show jumps. It was a really good thing at that time that Star was on part livery as even if I wanted to hide under the duvet on a Saturday and Sunday I couldn't as Star needed to be looked after. Seeing to Star gave me a reason to get up and a purpose. It kept my mind occupied, gave me time with my friends who were up at the yard seeing to their horses, it was fresh air and it was great exercise. I genuinely believe having Star at that time was a real blessing as she really did help me work through my grief, and she has done in times since. There is a lot of research to suggest that contact with an animal is therapeutic. Plus the good thing about Star is I can talk to her and she doesn't answer back!
The last twelve months have been pretty hard as my Dad's battle with dementia came to an end in July 2018. Below is a picture of Dad in happier times on his birthday.

Yet again Star is one of the main things that has kept me going through the grief. Watching Dad battle such an awful disease over a number of years has been absolutely heartbreaking. There have been times when I have just gone to the field hugged Star and cried into her neck and she has just stood there and let me. Sometimes the back of my jumper or my pony tail would even get a little groom off her! The bond I have with Star is unbreakable. I would go as far to say I would take a bullet for that pony. There have been so many times when I have been worried or upset about something and she has helped me through. She is always there to cheer me up with that cheeky face, that sassy attitude and those ears pricked forward. She's my baby girl and I couldn't imagine life without her. In those times when life is dark with grief she has always been my 'Shining Star'.